Stay With Me
by TrisEatonTobiasPrior
Summary: Peter and Tris have a one night stand that Peter can't get over. (PETRIS) Rated T for mentions of sex.


**song: stay with me by sam smith**

(peter's pov)

_guess it's true, i'm not good at a one night stand_

In all honesty, I don't know what happened. My memory is still hazy, but what I do remember is clothes on the ground and my name on Beatrice Prior's lips. I was talking to her one minute, and on top of her the next.

In all honesty, I don't want to know what happened. I just want to forget. But she, she, won't let me forget. Her body, the way she moved, the way everything went on, will not let me forget. I was not supposed to like Tris, I was not supposed to touch Tris, I was not supposed to be thinking about Tris.

She told me in the morning to never bring this up. She was embarrassed and left in a hurry, in just as much of a disorganized state as I was. Yet, all day, she hasn't looked my way. Is she feeling the lust that I am? Is she feeling my lingering touch the way that I am feeling hers?

Our 'one night stand' was not supposed to happen, but it did, and now, it's driving me crazy.

_but i still need love cause i'm just a man_

Before I left Candor, my mother told me that I would never have a wife or someone who loved me because I was a terrible person with no heart. She told me that if I stayed in Candor, she would disown me and get a restraining order on me, because sixteen years of hell was already too much.

It hit me hard.

I knew that I was not normal from the first day of kindergarten. I had never left Candor before, and didn't understand why there were so many other people, who I had never seen before, that didn't look like I did. Why were they wearing red and yellow instead of black and white?

That day, when I got home, I asked my father that question and others of the sort. They are not like us, he told me, and they are bad. I was to associate with them as little as possible, and keep to myself. But I couldn't. Once I heard that these people were 'bad', I made it my mission to treat them like so. I went to the Amity girls in my class, pulling their skirts off and making them cry. I punched the Erudite boys, teased the Abnegation, and tried to fight the Dauntless. I thought this would please my parents.

Over time, this became who I was. I was ruthless, and someone to be afraid of; it was my image. And no matter how many times I tried to think about how to change that, I couldn't.

You would've thought that I expected people to hate me. And I did. I was very aware of the fact that my teachers and peers disliked me with a strong passion, but my own parents? I truly believed that they loved me, and I had every right. They were my parents. Parents love their children, don't they?

Not mine.

So, when Tris gave herself to me, I felt loved. I felt like I mattered, even if it was just for a few hours. She was a gorgeous, strong, brave girl who I had tortured, yet she still gave me everything. She let who I was and what I'd done get past her, and saw me as a good person. A human being who wasn't out for blood; a boy who didn't live for the pain of others.

_these nights never seem to go to plan_

Tris wasn't my 'first'. There were a few girls back in Candor who I had used as a distraction from my confusing life, a few girls who said they loved me but were through with me within a week. A few girls who stroked my hair, rested their head on my shoulder, and held my hand. A few girls who kissed me hard. But only one girl who made it feel real, who made it feel right; Tris. And it figured that the one girl who did that to me, was the girl I couldn't have.

_i don't want you to leave, will you hold my hand_

I couldn't hold myself back any longer. I waited until she was walking back to the dorms before calling out, "Tris!" She spun around, her gray-blue eyes startled.

"Peter," she murmured, sending a shiver through my body. I loved the way my name sounded when she said it.

"I need to talk to you."

Tris was starting to blush, evidently remembering the events of last night. Do not think about it, Peter. "No, Peter," Tris shook her hand. "I can't… I'm sorry. I'm sorry about last night, I'm sorry about everything. I don't know what was wrong with me and-"

"Nothing is wrong with you," I made my way toward her, taking her hands in mine. "Nothing has ever been wrong with you. You're perfect."

"Peter," Tris tried to break away, but I tightened my grip.

"I need to talk to you, Tris," I started to beg. "Please!"

"Fine."

_oh, won't you stay with me_

We walked in silence, side by side. This was the same path we took the night before; all the way to the Chasm, where I pinned her up against the wall and kissed her to the rhythm of the water. Tris was fiddling with her hair, her hands; whatever she could do to keep her from staring my way. Finally, I stopped, leaning over the railing.

"Tris, I think I might like you."

Tris snorted. "If this is some kind of way to get a repeat of last night, it's not going to work. I was extremely disoriented and wasn't thinking straight. You got lucky."

I felt a pang of sadness in my chest, beginning to feel the same way I did when I used to speak to my mother. "I don't want a repeat of last night. I just want to talk to you, no touching involved. Calm down."

"Peter, I'm not an idiot. You hated me before you had sex with me."

I looked down, focusing on the water in the Chasm. "Tris, please."

"My parents warned me about boys like you, who were in it for the pleasure, and just so you know, I'm not that type of girl. I'm ashamed and humiliated by my actions, and what I said this morning I meant. What I did was completely and utterly uncharacteristic of me, and you need to forget about it. It never happened."

"Tris!"

"I'm leaving."

_cause you're all i need_

She started to walk away, but I didn't let her get far. "Tris, stop!" I yelled, jogging to catch up with her. "You didn't let me talk."

Tris sighed. "I don't want to hear it."

"I'm willing to be serious about our relationship!" She continued walking.

"Our 'relationship' doesn't exist."

"I. Will. Do. Anything. Tris, I need you!"

That stopped her in her tracks.

"I don't want you for anything but who you are. You have an amazing personality, you're insanely gorgeous, and I'm not going to stop trying to get you to see that I'm not in it for pleasure, or sex, or whatever. You make me feel special, loved, and worth something. You may not know this, but my entire life I've pushed people around because that's all I ever known and no one has ever liked me, not even my family! You think what I've done to you is hard, but some of the things that have happened for me has to be worse. At least your mother and father care about you!" I was starting to yell, jabbing my finger at nothing in particular.

"Peter, I didn't…"

"Exactly. You didn't know. And now that you do, how does that make you feel?"

_this ain't love, it's clear to see_

"We don't have to be in love," I said. "I just want you to give me a chance, try me out. See the kind of person I can be. Trust me."

Tris was silent, looking me in the eyes. I wondered if she could see the pain, the tears, and the love swarming in them. I wondered if she could see all my emotions. I wondered if she could see how she looked in my eyes; a perfect, gorgeous girl. "Actually, Peter Hayes, I think I'm already in love."

And in that moment, I knew she did.

_but darling, stay with me_

From that moment on, Tris and I were almost always together. We didn't kiss or touch each other very often, but the moments that we walked through the halls, hand in hand, smiling at each other, were even better. My mother couldn't yell at me anymore, and my father couldn't be disappointed in me. I was no longer a failure.

And to think, that just one beautiful little Abnegation girl could show me that.


End file.
